Here's a few more he could add to his act. Kids got them from school, they think they are funny:
A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a cold one. The bartender gives it to him and says "that'll be $25."
A minute later making conversation the bartender says "We don't get many gorillas round these parts."
The gorilla replies "At these prices, you won't get many more, either!"
A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat.
The police stop him and say that he can't drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off.The next day the same man is driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back and again.
He is stopped by the same police officer who says, "Hey! I though I told you to take those to the zoo."The man replies "I did. Today I'm taking them to the movies."
A man walked into a bar and sat down next to a man with a dog at his feet. "Does your dog bite?" he asked. "No," was the reply.
A few minutes later, the dog took a huge chunk out of his leg. "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!" the man said indignantly.
"That's not my dog".
A man was stopped by the police for going the wrong way down a one-way street. The cop says "Didn't you see the arrows"? The man says "Arrows? I didn't even see the Indians"!