I always loved a few old Henny Youngman jokes.
The other day my wife told me she wanted to go on Holidays.
I asked her where she wanted to go.
She said I want to go somewhere I've never been before
I said try the kitchen.
or
Take my wife. I take my wife everywhere...but she finds her way home.
or finally
A doctor says to a man, "You want to improve your love life? You need to get some exercise. Run ten miles a day." Two weeks later, the man called the doctor. The doctor says, "How is your love life since you have been running?" "I don't know, I'm 140 miles away!"